The first one is another humourous one. I'm enjoying these!
This layout is called a "tent card" (since the top of the card is kind of sitting on a tent base I guess). The lady is by Inky Antics. The background is embossed with a cuttlebug plate. The saying is from Viva Las Vegas. You can't really tell it very much, but I put stickles on the ball so it sparkles. The outside quote says "Skinny people irritate me! Especially when they say things like "You know, sometimes I just forget to eat."